Adventures in Manifesting
Several weeks ago, I was stopped at a light in my car and a man behind me got mad because I took an extra second or two when the light turned red. He got so angry that he threw a chewed-up pizza crust and then a fresh slice (a fresh slice!) at my car. For a week I had a greasy pizza schmear on my back window to remind me of the incident.
When it happened I broke into spontaneous, slightly hysterical laughter before breaking down into tears; it was my body’s response to the shock and surprise.
The irony is I took the extra few seconds at the light because it was lunch time and I was thinking that I might want some pizza. People! That is some freaky level power of manifestation right there! ;-)
I don’t know about you but for me I’ve come to the realization that in the “manifestation” game, I am always getting back what I put out, even when it sometimes feels like a “WTF was that about” moment. Sometimes the desires I put out (i.e., pizza) will get delivered hot, fresh and on a platter. And other times it gets delivered sideways and thrown at the back of my car and I’m left with a greasy pizza schmear and a story.
In both cases though, I’m manifesting exactly what I want. It’s just that in one version there is nothing in the way mentally, emotionally, or energetically between my desire and the getting of my desire. In other words, in the restaurant of life, I put in my order, go about my day without worry, anxiety, or faithlessness I won’t get it, and my meal comes.
In the other version however – the pizza chucking version – I put my desire out there with an unconscious side order of fear, anger, faithlessness, or whatever. I get the desire delivered, and sometimes tweaked, with all the other stuff attached and along for the ride as well.
The day I got the pizza thrown at me I was quietly looking at and working through fears and concerns I had of being vilified and attacked just for being me. And I vaguely remember feeling at the time how much I really wanted to work through that. So viola’! The universe delivered. In one shot I got both the pizza and the opportunity to work through the feelings that came up for “being attacked and vilified for being me.”
I’m aware that this may come across as self-serving, self-centered or self-referential. And I would agree with you. But who cares! We’re all a little (or a lot) self-serving, self-centered and self-referential, and we’re all making this shit up as we go along. And if everything is a game, and I prefer to believe it is, than why not play the game of “I am manifesting everything in my life and everything in my life shows me what I am manifesting.” It’s way better and way more empowering than playing the game of “life is shit and shit always happens to me.”
So… in life, which game are you playing?